140+ Grape Puns And Jokes That Are Simply Grapeful”

If you’re looking for the best grape puns and jokes, you’ve landed in the right vineyard! Whether you want funny one-liners, clever Instagram captions, playful knock-knock jokes, or even some cheeky adult humor, this collection of 180+ grape-related puns and jokes is guaranteed to make you laugh (or at least make you wine a little). From short, snappy wordplay to hilarious question-and-answer jokes, we’ve covered everything—so you can sip, laugh, and share with your friends. Plus, we’ll even dive into which celebrity is nicknamed “Grapes” for a little trivia fun. So, let’s raisin the humor levels and get started with the juiciest grape puns you’ll ever find!

Short One-Liner Grape Puns

1. This might sound vine, but I’m grapeful for you.
2. I’m raisin the bar with these puns!
3. You’re grape at everything you do.
4. Don’t wine about it, just enjoy!
5. I’m grapeful for this sweet friendship.
6. It’s time to wine down and relax.
7. This party is grape expectations!
8. You’re un-be-leaf-ably sweet, just like grapes.
9. Grape things take time to mature.
10. I heard it through the grapevine!

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Grape Puns Reddit

1. The grape debate: Is juice better than wine?
2. When grapes gossip, they do it through the vine.
3. My grape friend always keeps things juicy.
4. Raisins are just grapes who had a rough day.
5. Grape minds think alike!
6. Life’s a vineyard—full of ups and downs.
7. Grape expectations lead to sweet success.
8. He wasn’t bitter, just a little tart.
9. A grape job is one that lets you wine down.
10. I tried to make wine, but it was a fermenting disaster.

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Grape Puns for Instagram

1. Feeling grape today!
2. Sip happens.
3. Just a bunch of grape friends having fun!
4. I heard it through the grapevine… this pic is cute!
5. Too grape to function.
6. In my juice era.
7. Vine and dine me.
8. Sweet, sassy, and a little bit wine-y!
9. It’s always wine o’clock somewhere.
10. A grape day starts with a glass of wine!

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Grape Puns Captions

1. Grape times with even better people.
2. Squeeze the day!
3. Just a little grape in a big vineyard.
4. Keep calm and sip on.
5. Grape vibes only!
6. Feeling vine today.
7. Pour decisions make great stories.
8. Aged to perfection, just like fine wine.
9. Let’s raisin the fun!
10. A glass of wine a day keeps the worries away!

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Funny Grape Puns

1. Stop wining and start shining!
2. This is the best bunch of friends ever!
3. Grape minds think alike.
4. Time to pop a bottle and celebrate.
5. You’re un-wine-ding too much!
6. This situation is fermenting quickly.
7. Juice don’t know how much I appreciate you.
8. Grapes are berry good for you!
9. I can’t concentrate, I’m just too grape!
10. Another raisin to be happy!

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Clever Grape Puns

1. You’re grape at making me smile.
2. This friendship is un-wine-ding beautifully.
3. The best things in life are fermented.
4. I’m aging like a fine wine.
5. Don’t be sour, be a little sweeter!
6. Wine flies when you’re having fun!
7. There’s always room for one more grape idea.
8. Let’s keep things juicy!
9. Grape things happen to those who wait.
10. I’m feeling vine-tastic!

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Cute Grape Puns

1. You’re grape-ly appreciated.
2. I’m berry excited to see you!
3. This love is like fine wine, it gets better with time.
4. Grape job, you nailed it!
5. Juice wanna be friends?
6. I love you bunches!
7. You make my heart go pop!
8. We’re just two grapes in a bunch.
9. Our friendship is the sweetest!
10. You’re a grape catch!

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Dirty Grape Puns

1. Are you a grape? Because you make me wine.
2. You must be a fine wine, because you get better with age.
3. I’m not a sommelier, but I know a full-bodied beauty when I see one.
4. You and I would make a grape pair.
5. I’m intoxicated by your presence.
6. You make me feel bubbly inside.
7. You must be a vineyard, because I want to spend all my time in you.
8. Your love is like wine—it gets me tipsy.
9. I’m pressed up against you like a fine wine bottle.
10. Let’s uncork the fun tonight!

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Love Grape Puns

1. I love you bunches!
2. Our love is like fine wine—only gets better with time.
3. You and I are a perfect blend.
4. I’m crushing on you like a vineyard crushes grapes.
5. You make my heart ferment with joy.
6. I’d sip and stay with you forever.
7. You’re my grape-est love.
8. Our love is sweeter than grape juice.
9. Life without you would be un-wine-ding.
10. You make my heart pop like champagne!

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Which Celebrity or Athlete is Nicknamed “Grapes”?

• Don Cherry, a Canadian ice hockey commentator and former coach, is famously nicknamed “Grapes.”

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Short One-Liner Grape Jokes

1. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? It ran out of juice!
2. I told a grape joke… but it was un-peel-ievable!
3. The grape couldn’t help but wine about everything.
4. What did the grape say to the raisin? “You’re looking a little wrinkled.”
5. Grapes make the best friends—they’re always in bunches!
6. I asked the grape what’s up—he said, “Not much, just hanging on the vine.”
7. Grape juice is just wine with commitment issues.
8. The grape didn’t want to be turned into wine, but he was pressed into it.
9. The vineyard workers were great—always raisin the bar!
10. A grape’s favorite song? “Crush” by David Archuleta!

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Funny Grape Jokes

1. Why did the grape go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well!
2. What do you call a sad grape? A wine baby!
3. Why did the grape refuse to fight? He didn’t want to get crushed!
4. What’s a grape’s favorite sport? Vine vaulting!
5. Why don’t grapes ever get lost? They always stick together!
6. Why did the grape break up with the raisin? It couldn’t handle the dry humor.
7. What do you get when you cross a grape and a lion? A grape that roars!
8. Why do grapes never get lonely? They always come in bunches!
9. What do you call a grape that loves music? A jam session!
10. What’s a grape’s favorite type of movie? Anything cheesy!

Grape Jokes for Adults

1. Why did the grape refuse to go to the party? It didn’t want to be crushed!
2. What’s a grape’s favorite bar drink? Anything fermented!
3. Why don’t grapes ever get stressed? They always know how to wine down!
4. I tried to make a joke about wine, but it was just too dry!
5. What did the grape say to the bottle of wine? “You complete me.”
6. Why did the grape turn into a raisin? Mid-life crisis hit hard!
7. What’s a vineyard’s favorite pickup line? “I’ll make you feel bubbly inside.”
8. How do grapes stay in shape? They wine and dine carefully!
9. What did one drunk grape say to another? “I think I’ve lost my raisin for being here!”
10. Why do grapes love romantic dinners? Because they love to wine and dine!

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Grape Jokes for Kids

1. Why did the grape go to school? To become a little smarter than a raisin!
2. What’s a grape’s favorite subject? History—it’s full of old vines!
3. What’s a grape’s least favorite weather? Hailstorms—they always get smashed!
4. Why do grapes always win at hide and seek? They blend in with the bunch!
5. How did the grape cheer up his friend? He gave him a little squeeze!
6. What’s a grape’s favorite holiday? Christmas—it’s full of raisin’ spirits!
7. What kind of music do grapes listen to? Smooth jazz (or jam sessions!)
8. Why don’t grapes like fast food? Because they prefer to be slowly crushed!
9. What do you get when you cross a grape with a cow? Purple milkshakes!
10. What’s a grape’s favorite toy? A squishy stress ball!

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Funny Grape Jokes

1. Why did the grape bring a suitcase? Because it was ready to wine and dine!
2. What do you call a grape that loves to dance? A raisin the roof!
3. Why did the grape sit in the sun? It wanted to turn into a raisin for a change!
4. What’s a grape’s favorite TV show? The Juice is Right!
5. Why was the grape feeling down? It got stepped on all day long!
6. What did the grape say to the banana? You peel my heart!
7. Why did the grape get promoted? Because it was crushing its goals!
8. What’s a grape’s dream job? A vineyard manager!
9. Why do grapes always make great friends? Because they’re always sticking together!
10. How do grapes apologize? They say, “I’m wine-derfully sorry!”

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Knock-Knock Grape Jokes

1. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Grape.
   Grape who?
   Grape things take time, so be patient!
2. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Wine.
   Wine who?
   Wine not let me in?
3. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Raisin.
   Raisin who?
   Raisin the roof with these jokes!
4. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Vine.
   Vine who?
   Vine are you ignoring me?
5. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Juice.
   Juice who?
   Juice the best person I know!
6. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Crush.
   Crush who?
   Crushin’ on these grape jokes!
7. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Squeeze.
   Squeeze who?
   Squeeze me, I’m too juicy to ignore!
8. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Jam.
   Jam who?
   Jam-packed with grape jokes today!
9. Knock, knock!
   Who’s there?
   Berry.
   Berry who?
   Berry nice to see you, grape friend!
10. Knock, knock!
    Who’s there?
    Vino.
    Vino who?
    Vino it’s time for some wine?

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Cute Grape Jokes

1. Why are grapes so sweet? Because they always hang around great people!
2. I told my grape friend a secret… He promised not to spill the juice!
3. Why did the grape blush? Because it saw the wine bottle open!
4. What did the grape say when it won the race? “That was a crushing victory!”
5. How do grapes make important decisions? They go with the flow… of the wine!
6. Why do grapes never feel lonely? Because they come in bunches!
7. What do you call a grape that tells funny jokes? A pun-kin grape!
8. Why did the grape refuse to jump off the table? Because it didn’t want to be a raisin!
9. What did the grape say to the watermelon? “You’re one in a melon!”
10. How do you make a grape giggle? Tickle its vine!

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Grape Puns and Jokes

1. Why did the grape stop rolling? It ran out of juice!
2. How did the grape become famous? It crushed the competition!
3. What’s a grape’s favorite holiday? New Year’s Eve—so they can pop bottles!
4. What do you call a grape that can’t stop talking? A chatter-bunch!
5. Why did the grape refuse to fight? Because it was squeezed into a tough situation!
6. Why was the grape so confident? Because it had grape self-esteem!
7. What do you call a group of musical grapes? A jam session!
8. What’s a grape’s favorite book? The Grapes of Wrath!
9. What did the grape say to the banana? “You peel me up!”
10. Why do grapes make good detectives? Because they always follow the vine!